35 years young.

                           Today, I turned 35 years young!

While the significance of birthdays does grow a bit stale the older we get, this particular one is anything BUT stale for me. “Why?” you may ask.

Well, it's simple really... I woke up this morning and honestly felt a bit like I was glowing.

The juxtaposition from last years birthday morning is literally night and day. I'll spare any major details, but last years birthday was awful. I was in a living situation that made me extremely unhappy, I was not emotionally, spiritually, or physically healthy and was truly struggling with myself on pretty much every level that one can feel struggle. 

Let's just say... I cried all day the day I turned 34.

Today, however, I woke up smiling. Truly. I woke up with a smile on my face. I rolled over and turned off my alarm song, Robbin Thompson serenading me awake with “It's Gonna Be a Good Day!” and I grabbed my phone. I was immediately serenaded again, this time by three squeaky voices on my voicemail singing “Happy birthday Aunt Caffree! Cha-cha-cha!” My heart. Right there. Not too long after I got a perfect message from my bestie and an “I want to sing you the ABC's for your birthday!” message from my non-blood nephew. My heart. Again. Then a mommy and daddy serenade. Then a Paw-Paw serenade. A birthday isn't a birthday in our family until Paw-Paw sings.                Off to a pretty great start, huh?

It has only gotten better and better from there. And I don't just mean because of the circumstances of my day; the gorgeous weather, the amazing church service, the perfect gift from a precious new forever friend, the perfect time outside with friends enjoying a delicious meal on the patio of a beautiful restaurant, the multiple times I was stopped and told how adorable my dress is, the wonderful phone call from my brother (who happens to be across an ocean), the fact that I am leaving my house soon to go enjoy fireworks with my girlfriends, etc... (Yes. Fireworks. On my birthday. They are, of course, in honor and celebration of Memorial Day and our lost soldiers and servicemen and women, but I secretly like to think they are for me too in celebration of this grand occasion in my own life. I'm allowed to think that, right??)

I don't just mean all that. 

I mean me. 

Pure and simple- I have gotten better. 

I was once so “sick”- inside and out, but SO MUCH has changed for me over the course of the last year of my life. I have gotten better. I have rediscovered, uncovered, buried, dusted off, settled, accepted, cherished, remembered, recognized, and appreciated. 

I have changed. I have grown. I am content now.

I'll never understand why our God is so patient, and gentle, and loving with His kids. 

I sure am glad He is though. It feels good to feel good again.

It feels good to wake up smiling.

Here's to 35!!

The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

Psalm 34:18